yau

bai yarda cewa ba shaye shaye nake yi

ba, Har yau bai yarda cewa ba yawon banza nayi na samu ciki ba. And you don't

want yours to see you naked?" Ya girgiza kai "Please believe me Safiyya,

ban dauka abin zai kai haka ba. Ban san

zai gane ba. Ban san zai dauka a buge

kike ba. Ban san zaki samu ciki ba. Dan

Allah ki yarda, dan Allah ki tsaya muyi

magana" ya fada hawaye yana bin gefen

fuskar sa.

na hadiye dacin da yake makogwaro na

nace '"ba ka san zai faru ba, but ya faru,

and nothing will change that, nothing will

bring me back what you took" na dauko

waya ta nace "are you going to choose or

should I choose for you? Maybe Umma? I

bet she will be very happy that her son is

a rapist. You have three seconds.. 1, 2...".

Da sauri yace "yaya, call yaya" na mayar

da wayar jaka nace "sai nayi bacci na

tashi tukunna" sannan na juya na kai

bakin kofa ya sake kira na, na tsaya ban

juyo ba, yace "think about this one last

time, do you really want to do this? It is

going to be my words against yours" na

juyo da fuskata ina kallon sa nace "'no

husband, it is going to be your

words against yours"

Maman Maama✍🏻

[07/01, 10:46 pm] +234 906 816 1960: ❤️‍🩹Safiyya❤️‍🩹

Episode Forty Two: Shattered Desires

Not Edited.

Ina fita na shiga mota ta na tayar a dai dai

lokacin da mai gadin gidan yake kokarin

yin alwala, ya ajiye butar hannunsa da

sauri ya taho inda nake "Hajiya..... Allah

dai ya sa lafiya" nace "lafiya lau, zan yi

tafiya ne kuma jirgin mu in an jina kadan

zai tashi" ya gyada kai cikin fahimta

amma kuma sai yace "ai da mai gidan ya

raka ki Hajiya, garin ne kin san yanzu sai a

hankali. Ina ji miki tsoron fita ke kadai" na

kirkiri murmushi nace "nayi addu'a. Now,

bude min gate" na karasa maganar da

authority a voice dina, ya juya da sauri

yaje ya bude gate din na ja mota ta na fita.

Gidan mu na zarce direct, na tarar mai

Eta gadin mu ya davo daga masallaci kenan

yana shirin bude gate sai ya ga mota ta,

ya gane motar amma sai ya fasa bude

kofar ya dawo da baya yana kara kokarin

ganin wanda ya ke cikin motar, na sauke

tinted glass din windon motar dan saukaka masa gani na. Yayi sauri ya sussuna "sannu da zuwa ranki ya dade" ban ce komai ba sai na mayar da window

na rufe, ya ruga da sauri ya bude gate din

ni kuma na shiga da motar ciki nayi

packing dinta a gurin da dama nan ne

inda nake ajjiye ta. Na sauke ajjiyar zuciya

sannan na bude kofa na fito, mai gadin ya

karaso inda nake yana kallo na da hasken

alfijir da ya fara haska gari, "sannu da

zuwa, da assuba haka? Babu kowa amma

a cikin gidan" nace "ina Esther?" Yace

"taje gida suna biki. Sai yau zata dawo"

ssi kuma ya koma dakin sa da sauri ya

dauko key ya kawo min. "ga keys ta bari

da ma ko za'a yi bako" na karba nace

'"'shikenan. Nagode Baba Ya'u".

Na juya na shiga cikin gida amma ina jin

sa yana kallo na. Na bude kofa na shiga,

falon da duhu sai na kunna fitilar wayata

da niyyar zan haska hanya ba sai na

kunna fitilu ba. Ina haska fitilar sai ta

sauka akan hoton Baba Hadiza da

yayanta. Na karasa gaban su na tsaya ina

kallon su, they all looked happy and kuma

kamar ni suke kallo, Na saka hannu na

shafa fuskar Ammie "hey Ammieme" sai

kuma na wuce hoton na tafi hanyar da

zan hau stairs zuwa dakina, Ina shiga dakin na kunna fitila, sai na ga Esther ta rufe komai na dakin da yadi dan kar yayi kura, atmosphere din dakin was

suffocating tunda komai a rufe yake, na

ajiye jakar hannuna na bude windows din

akin sannan na yaye yadin da ta rufe

gado da shi na bude closet na dauko

bedsheet na zo na shimfida akan gadon

sai kuma a shiga toilet nayo alwala na

fito nayi sallah. Ina idarwa na mayar da

windows din na rufe sannan na kunna ac

na saka waya ta on silent mode na bi

lafiyar gado na kwanta, and I slept like a

baby, irin baccin da tun da naje gidan

Mukhtar ban yi irin sa ba.

Him👳🏻‍♀️

Three Months ago……

Kamar wani engine haka Muhammad

Gidado ya mayar da kansa, daga ina kake

aiki ina zaka je aiki me yi aiki, Abba da

kansa had to tell him to slow down and

take things easy. Within the first few

weeks da ya fara yiwa abba aiki ya yi

securing musu business deals da yawan

da Abba bai yi tsammani ba. He takes

risks and he no send anybody, Nan da

nan sunan shi ya fara shiga bakunan

business partners din su and they tried to

make deals with him, wadansu deals din

ya karba wadansu kuma yayi watsi da su, A gida kuma yana iyakacin kokarin sa na ganin cewa hanya bata hada su da Safina ba. Saboda idan bai ganta ba yakan

manta da wasu abubuwan amma da zarar

ya ganta zai ji duk damuwowin sa sun

dawo masa sababbi fil. Sannan kuma

babu yadda za'a yi su hadu din bata gaya

masa maganar da zata tuna masa cewa

ita yayar Safiyya ce and Safiyya is now

someone else's wife. Wannan knowledge

din kuma shine abinda yake fin komai

dagula masa lissafi ya kuma bata masa

rai. Idan kuma ran nasa ya baci sai yaje ya

huce akan punching bag din da ya saka a

cikin gym dinsa. Wannan punching bag

din da ace mutum ce da babu kashin da

ba zai karye a jikin ta ba saboda irin

dukan da take sha a gurin Muhammad. A zuciyarsa yana son ya cigaba da digging labarin Safiyya kamar yadda ya fara, amma kuma yana dakatar da kansa

dan yana gudun sabawa ubangiji, ya

tabbatar Safiyya a yanzu matar aure ce

tunda babanta da kansa ya gaya masa,

cigaba da bibiyarta kuma a matsayin ta na

matar aure haramun ne kuma zai iya jawo

masa fushin ubangiji. A gefe daya kuma ya san the more he hold on to her the more soyayyar ta take karuwa a zuciyarsa wanda shima hakan ba dai dai bane ba kuma bai san inda hakan zai kai shi ba.

Ya tuna da abinda tace masa, she said he

should accept his fate kamar yadda ita

ma tayi accepting kuma take facing na ta,

ya tuna da tambayar da yayi mata akan

tana nufin yayi accepting Safina? And she

couldn't answer that, sai dai fuskar ta ta

nuna tsantsar kishin sa da take yi akan

Safina.

Safinan kuma ita ce babban problem din

sa a yanzu. Ya tsane ta. Ya tsane ta ba

kadan ba. Ya kasa cire tunanin cewa tana

da hannu a cikin koma menene ya samu

Safiyya, koma menene ya chanja da

Safiyya from a cheerful soul to a

sorrowful soul. Gani yake yi kamar Safina

ce tayi mata wani abu dan ta raba su ita ta

same shi. Dan irin soyayyar da take nuna

masa is scary, it is obsession. Ko kadan

©️? bata yin zuciya da shi ko tayi masa fushi

duk kuwa da irin trailer trailer ta rashin

mutunci da yake sauke mata. Sai dai tayi

kuka ta gama ta cigaba da ga inda ta

tsaya,

Ko da sau daya bata taba fashin yi masa

girki ba, zata yi breakfast ta kawo masa

za kuma tayi dinner, ranar da taga yana

gida bai fita ba har lunch take yi masa

amma bai taba yin ko da loma daya ba.

Sometimes he wondered me take yi da

abincin idan bai ci ba? Shi kuma yana

iyakacin kokarin sa wajan ajiye mata kudi

a kusa da abincin da ta kawo din, a

ganinsa ya rage wa kansa nauyin ta na

ciyarwa. Amma kuma a kasan zuciyar sa

ya san ba wannan ne kadai nauyin ta da

yake kansa ba. But he couldn't even think

of sauke dayan nauyin. God forbid….

Sai dai ita kuma a nata bangaren tana yin

duk kan kokarin ta na taga cewa ya sauke

wancan nauyin da yake gudu din, tunda

ita lissafin ta shine sauke wancan nauyin

shine kadai hanyar da zata bi ta ga ta juyo

da hankalinsa gare ta. If only he will come

to her bed……. If only he will let her go to

his bed. Amma san babu hanya kuma

babu fuska,

Ta sha gwada shiga dakinsa, amma babu

abinda take samu a cikin dakin sai

wulakanci da bakar magana, Ta sha

gwada yaudarar sa zuwa nata dakin,

amma tun shigar da yayi ranar da su twins suka zo bai sake shiga ba. Sai ta chanja salo, har a falon nashi ba ta kyale shi ba duk inda yayi in dai yana gidan sai ta bishi ta nuna masa jikinta with any opportunity

da ta samu.

And then one day, three weeks after

komawar su Safiyya Kano, about a month

kenan da bikin su. Muhammad ya tashi da

assuba yayi sallah sai ya shiga gym dinsa

kamar kullum ya fara gudu akan treadmill,

dama yanzu al'adar sa kenan kullum

bayan sallar asuba zai shiga yayi exercise

in ya gama kuma sai yaje yayi wanka yayi

breakfast ya fita, exercise din yana sa ya

zama more focused and more productive

a gurin aikin sa.

Kamar kullum ranar ma ya toshe

kunnuwansa yana jin kida while running,

his mind focused on the lyrics. A lokacin

ne yaji kamshin turarenta and yaji haushin

kansa for forgetting to close the door.

Dan yanzu ya zama shi da gidan sa amma

bashi da ikon barin kofa a bude sai ta

shigo ta takura masa, Ya cigaba da

abinda yake yi, knowing fully well abinda

zai gani dan ya kalli inda take and he

wasn't looking forward to it. Amma bata

hakura ba sai da ta taho ta zagaya ta tsaya a gaban treadmill din.

Wando ne a jikin ta three quaters length

wanda ya kama ta sosai dan Muhammad

ya tabbatar sai da ta sha wahala kafin ta

saka shi, da kuma half vest wadda ko

rabin cikinta bata rufe ba kuma babu

brazier a cikin ta. Tayi packing gashin

kanta a gefe daya ta zubo shi kan kafadar

ta daya, fuskar ta babu kwalliya sai

murmushi da yake kwance a lebenta. Yayi sauri ya sauka daga kan treadmill din

dan saura kadan ya fadi "damn it" ya fada

cikin tsawa tare da dafe kansa "what the

hell are you doing here?" Tayi magana

amma bai ji ba saboda kunnensa da yake

toshe. Ya cire abin kidan sannan ya sake

cewa cikin tsawa trying as much as he

can to not look at her "Malama ki fita ki

bani guri, Wai ke wacce irin mutum ce?

Are you insane? Haka aka koya miki

tarbiyya a gidan ku?".

Ta saka hannun ta daya tana shafa gashin

kanta zuwa kafadar ta tace "gidan mu

sunyi min tarbiyya sosai, Na kuma gode

musu. Ban ga abin rashin tarbiyya dan na

gaishe da miji na ba, Ina fatan ka tashi

lafiya" yace "to be frank with you, lafiya lau na tashi and I was looking forward to this day saboda ina da muhimman abubuwan da nake da su a gaba na, but

now I am not so sure. You destroyed my

morning with your presence. Now get out

of my site".

Amma maimakon ya ga bacin ran abinda

ya fada a fuskarta sai yaga murmushi ta

cigaba da yi. "I am sorry Habibi. Na san

ma bata maka morning dinka tunda yanzu

na tabbatar in kaje office babu abinda

zaka iya yi sai tunani na. And that's

exactly what I want. I want you to think

about me, and know that I am yours, and I

am here a cikin gidan ka a matsayin matar

ka and ….

..." Ya nuna mata hanya "ki fita

nace miki tun kafin in chanja miki

kamannin ki. You have no idea how much I

have been trying to control my temper

around you. Ki kwashe wadannan

kafafuwan na ki ki dauki sauran mutuncin

da ya rage miki ki fita. You have no idea

how much I hate the site of you" amma

maimakon ta fita din kamar yadda ya

bukata sai ta durkusa a gaban sa fuskar

ta a kasa, "Muhammad. You can hate me

all you want, amma kasan cewa ni ina son

ka. Bana jin akwai wata mace kaf duniya

da zata yi maka irin son da nake yi maka, Kuma......

."Bai jira sauran maganar ta ta

ba ya juya ya fice ya bar mata gym din,

yana shiga dakin sa ya mayar da kofa ya

rufe dan gani yake yi zata iya biyo shi nan

din ma. Bayna ya rufe kofa sai da ya

jingina kansa a jikin kofar tare da rude

idonsa yana mayar da numfashi, wannan

wanne irin tashin hankali ne .... Yarinyar

nan ta wuce duk inda yake tunani a rashin

aji. Abinda kuma ya tabbatar wa kansa

shine ba zata hakura ba. Dan da zata

hakura da tuni ta hakura. Da tana da

zuciya da tuni tana gidan su.

A ranar a office ya yanke wata shawara.

Kasar zai bari. Akwai wasu tafiye tafiye

dama da ya fara tunani akai amma kuma

bai yanke shawara ba, wadansu tarurruka

ne na oil marketers da za'ayi a kasashe

uku cikin watanni uku masu zuwa,

kowanne wata daya za'a yi taro daya a

kasa daya, he was thinking of going to

one of the countries, amma ranar kawai

sai ya dauko takardu ya cike duk kasashe

ukun. Yana bukatar hutu gaskiya. Yana

bukatar time away from everything and

everyone musamman wanna halittar da

take gidan sa.

A ranar ya fara processing tafiyar, yadda

ya tsara shine in ya tafi ba zai dawo ba sai

an gama dukkan tarukan, daga kasar

farko zai wuce ta biyu sannan kuma ya wuce da uku. Ana tashi daga office ya tafi

gida ya fara yiwa Abba bayani, Abba ya

fahimta sosai kuma yaji dadin yadda yake

kokarin gain cigaban business din su.

Amma kuma sai ace "amma da matar ka

zaka tafi" Gidado yaji kamar Abba ya

kwada masa mari, yace "Abba business

trip ne fa? Ta yaya zan ringa yawo da ita a

cikin mutane? Ita kanta ba zata ji dadin

tafiyar ba" Abba yace "zata ji dadi mana.

And who told you ba zaka iya zuwa da

matarka business meetings ba? She is

your wife, you can take her anywhere.

Muhammad ya dafe kai yana jin kamar

zaiyi kuka.

Sai bayan da Abba ya tashi sannan Mama

ta dawo kusa da Muhammad tace "you

want to run away from your

responsibilities ko?" Ya gyara zaman sa

yace "haba Mama, wanne run away kuma

sai kace wani yaro. I just want a little

peace" tace "tana vi maka wani abu ne a

gidan that is not peaceful?" Yayi shiru bai

ce komai ba, bai sani ba ko tsayawa a

gabansa almost naked can be counted as

"not peaceful" ta cigaba "ni ina ganin ka

dauke ta ku tafin Muhammad, you both

need the trip,

Maybe tafiyar zata yi clearing issues din

ku ta samar muku fahimtar junan da kuke

lacking" yace "Mama. I planned the trip to

get away from her. How can I then carry

her along on a trip that is meant to get me

away from her" Mama tayi shiru tana

kallon sa, daga alama bata gane ba,

shima kan sa bashi da tabbacin yana

making sense or not.

O

Ganin duk ba zasu fahimce shi ba sai ya

mike zaiyi mata sallama ya tafi. Tana ta

kallon sa tace

"you are still thinking about

that girl ko?" Ya tsaya bai ce komai ba

kuma bai juyo ba, tace "wannan abin da

kake yi kana tayar da hankalin ka kaki ka

kwantar da hankalin ka kayi concentrating

on what God has blessed you with duk

saboda Safiyya ne ko?" Ya juyo yana

kallon ta amma bai ce komai ba, he can

see the hurt on her face amma kuma ba

zai iya ce mata ba saboda Safiyya bane

ba saboda shi ya san saboda itan ne.

Bai koma gida direct ba, sai da yayi yawo

a gari a mota dan ya danyi clearing brain

dinsa ya kuma nemawa kansa mafita.

Yana jin haushin kansa for loving Safiyya

too much, yana jin haushin Safiyya for

making him go through this dan a ganinsa

ita tayi causing komai, Sai da dare yayi

sosai sannan ya dauki hanyar gida, Sai dai

kuma to add to his troubles yana zuwa kofar dakin sa ya saka key zai bude sai yaga kofar ta bude, and he saw her standing a tsakiyar dakin tana jera pillows

akan gado. Ya fahimci kamar ta chanja

beddings din ne. Ya tsaya yana kallon ta,

ta gama jeran pillows, ta dauke wannan ta

juya wancan tayi straightening wannan

har ta gama sannan ta dauko turare tana

fesawa akan gadon.

Ya na daga bakin kofa yace "cire su ki

mayar da su inda kika debo su" ta juyo

tana kallon sa, daga alama ba ta san da

zuwan sa ba. Ta dan yi murmushi "yayi

kyau ko?" Bai ce komai ba ya sake hade

rai. Ta cigaba da murmushi "yayi min kyau

sosai, saboda na ka ne" ya sake maimaita

abinda yace "ki kwashe min su daga kan

gado ki mayar da su inda kika debo su".

Bata yi hakan ba sai ta tako ta taho inda

yake tsaye, rigar bacci ce a jikinta with a

very low neckline da yake bayyanar da

kusan rabin kirjinta.

Ta tsaya a gaban sa suna kallon juna.

"get out" ya fada cikin muryar da take nuna

tsananin tsanar ta. Tace "Muhammad.

Dan